Batman and a couple Robins

Because she's so worth it

2011-12-27T12:39:00.003-06:00

362 days ago, Marty, Deken and I got on a plane to bring home our little Faithy.... Little did we know about the great deal of energy we were going to be bringing along with it. This little wiggle worm is like this just about all day long. And it's the exact amount of positive energy we all needed around here.. :) Sorry the quality is bad, I didn't have time to fumble for the camera, but I had to get this on film... She'll hate me when she's older, but she still loves me now! :)

Oopsy....

2011-11-07T21:43:00.001-06:00

Hadn't realized that I haven't posted it here yet.. So for all my non-facebook friends (which you're welcome to join, come find me!) It's another boy for the Duffy's!!

Baby # 3 on his way home very soon we hope! Our newest little one is almost 18 months old, and is a bowl full of Jello! We've loved watching him grow (I mean GROW) in photos the last few months and can't wait to have him home with us for lot's of squeezes and love!!

Hoping to travel early next year (this year would be the miracle that we are praying for!) and love knowing that we will have another little man around here at the Duffy house, very soon! God is Good!!

What a difference a year makes.....

2011-10-21T14:52:00.000-05:00

A year ago I wrote this post...

What a difference a year makes!!

Dear Mr. President,

2011-10-18T13:42:00.005-05:00

INVISIBLE CHILDREN supports your actions against the LRA!

Well, and so do the Duffy's. I kind of wanted to write something about what's been going on, in that wonderful place that has given Marty and I, THREE beautiful children..

DISCLAIMER: This may not be a post for the youngin's....

For those that might not be aware of the situation, I have a few links attached so that you can spend some time looking through the history of the conflict in Northern Uganda. I really encourage everyone that reads this to educate themselves on the TRUTH of the matter. So many things have swirled around in the last few days, since the President of the US announced that a group of 100 advisory forces are being deployed to Uganda, to support the Ugandan government with equipment and tactical advice.

Here is a link to the announcement from Invisible Children, an organization set up to help combat the crisis in eastern and central Africa, caused by the destruction of the LRA (Lord's Resistance Army).

President Obama Targets the LRA from INVISIBLE CHILDREN on Vimeo.

Many people have voiced some anger towards this recent announcement, some criticizing by saying things like "Where has the US government been in the past?" Or that "Obama is only doing this because an election is coming up... " Please, really, educate yourself. Below is some info on the history of the crisis, and details the things that the US HAS been doing in the last several years, to combat the issue.

Africa's Longest Running War

The second thing I really want to bring light to is that there are many comments being posted, questioning the religious affiliation of the LRA. Some are blasting the US for it's new involvement, by saying that Obama is gladly sending troops out to kill Christians, because he is Muslim. It's so sad. If anyone is taking Rush Limbaugh's side on this one, I encourage you, again, please educate your self on the situation, instead of googling and taking the first piece of information you find on Wikipedia, to suffice your thoughts or opinion on the matter.

While we are uncertain of the religious implications of the LRA, no matter what their driving force, it's not for us to really decide if Joseph Kony and the LRA are killing in the name of God or plain psychotic. They're killing. Period. Jim Jones, Eddie Long, Fred Phelps, Emperor Theodosius, Adolph Hitler, Charlemagne, the FLDS, Clifford Peeples, the KKK. The list goes on and on. All of these people or groups, think that what they are doing, has been done to either honor, or in the name of God. No matter how distorted we may think their views are, and how atrocious their actions, we really shouldn't be judging if any, or all of them, are Christians. That's just not for us to decide.

We may yes, certainly, bring justice to the criminal actions they are committing. But let's leave the judging of their faith/Christianity to the chief Justice himself. Below is a link to some information about the LRA and what they are currently doing. Invisible Children is a great organization that thoroughly supports bringing justice to those that are imposing horrific crimes against humanity in Eastern and Central Africa. They said it best that this is NOT a political issue, but a human issue. This is about people. Innocent people. Men, Women and Children being slaughtered by the thousands. Please consider supporting Invisible Children and their efforts to raise awareness and seek Justice in Africa. They have many campaigns listed on their website that you can prayerfully support, and they are a wealth of information to be had.

Who is the LRA from INVISIBLE CHILDREN on Vimeo.

As Deken and I plan to head over to Uganda in the next few months, pray for our safety and travels. Uganda is like a second home to the Duffy family, and with new strides being taken to protect this home of ours, we are excited to hear more about the situation on the ground. Below are some more resources for your reading pleasure (or not). Mostly books about child soldiers and what it's really like for them. That's what it's like for the LRA.. Children being recruited and brainwashed to fight for such an absurd cause. It's so senseless, and it happens all over the world. Educate, Educate, Educate. Don't be afraid, and don't hide from it, because it's REAL. Not the Real Housewives of New Jersey. That's not really REAL. This is real. And scary. And now has HOPE.

Thank you for listening. Please don't use my opinions as proof to anything or reference. There is great solid fact and information on the INVISIBLE CHILDREN website that is available to you for free! Don't be afraid to peruse, educate yourself on the situation, and take action! And don't forget to see some of the links below. I've read some of the books, and as hard as they are to read, it's so important and encouraging to hear, those faced with such tragedy, can make their way through the darkness!

~Kathryn

A Long Way Gone

The Journey of the Lost Boys

God Grew Tired of Us

Child Soldiers: Violence and Protection

Armies of the Young

First Kill Your Family

Innocents Lost

Child Soldiers in Africa

War Child: A soldiers story

Child Soldiers by Leora Kahn

In Times of Prayer

2011-03-28T14:05:00.001-05:00

There's something about spring that is so motivating... People come out of their shells a bit (Or hibernation as a little girl at my sons school, matter-of-factly expressed). Windows are thrown open, even when it's still only 33 degrees in Chicago. Jackets are put in the closet, replaced with sweatshirts. And flip flops make their way out, even though we have to wear them with socks for a bit.

The air smells clean (if you can smell at all, for those of you with seasonal allergies like me) the sun is brighter than ever, and the car is even a bit warm when you climb in every morning.

We have busily been making some changes around the Duffy house. Moving furniture around, making rooms more accomodating, and giving the kids a little more space of their own (I have an independent bunch over here!)

But while I'm busy in my home, taking care of my family, and cleaning the winter out of the corners, some families out there are in a different place. In a hospital chair, at a loved ones bedside. In a foreign land, being told to leave without their child. About to become mommy's without anyone around to help.

It could be anything really. From far away you may think there is not much that can be done, but there IS! I've seen some strange things in the last few weeks. Friends and enemies banding together for a miraculous cause...

I've had my moments in life that have led me to uncomfortable places. Places where the unknown is present, new things and changes take over, challenges in front of me to be faced. In these times I always wonder what changes in me. How did I get there, and how did I make it through? I used to think that it was always God, putting me on a path, and showing me how to navigate it. While this is true, over the years, I've started hearing people around me talk about things they are praying for, people who needed lifting up, situations that needed resolution, even if they weren't apart of their own lives. It's something I've always done, always hoping God would answer my prayer for them. Some how I was a bit misconstrued on this concept though... I never thought about other people praying for ME, even when I didn't ask for it. And still never put two and two together, when something miraculously changed in my life...

Then I started to see what I'm calling the 'invisible prayer chain'. "How was I ever convinced to do THAT?" I'd say. Soon my answer became another question. "What if someone else prayed for me to do THAT?" How quickly a perspective changes. People that pray, that are faithful, that lift his name up. There's power in that! God orchestrates, because his believers call on him. God answers prayers because others believe. God wants for YOU, and others want for you too! Someone (or many someones) prayed, and a life was changed. Not adjusted, or modified from the original. CHANGED. Only God can do that, and only prayer can answer it. I guess it just took 28 and half years of life for me to realize that someone can pray for ME, and my life can be changed too!

It's powerful, and it's needed. If you can spare a few moments to read through some tough journeys that are going on right now, some families out there might be able to experience the life and joy that comes with the power of prayer.

First, a family is adopting a precious little boy that has down syndrome. However, the judge in this child's country decided after a 5 hour court hearing, that their child is better off staying in an institution, instead of being joined with his forever family. Please pray for this family and their fight to transform the minds of the judges, so they can be reunited with their son and bring him home! You can follow along with them here:

http://oureyesopened.blogspot.com/

Another family, that Marty and I had the pleasure of growing up with and had as classmates, is having a medical crisis. He's a sweet man named Godfrey. Please take a few minutes to read about him and his wife, Corinth, daughter Charissa, and baby #2 on the way. Pray for miraculous healing and strength! They are in desperate need for an opportunity for Godfrey to be transferred to Chicago for the care to make him well, and the insurance company has denied their funding.. Pray for their fight to transform the minds of those involved in the insurance decision, so Godfrey will get the care that he needs, and back with his family! You can follow their journey here, and join them in prayer in their guestbook!

http://www.godfreyjamescatanus.com/

Have a big mountain to be moved? Feel free to post a comment or message me about. Others will be praying! They always do :)

"Now Faith is being sure of what we hope for and CERTAIN of what we do not see...." Hebrews 11:1

~Kathryn

Good Friends Salman Rushdie and Harry Potter

2011-02-14T14:28:00.000-06:00

I noticed this shelf on one of our bookcases today... I thought it was a good example of what my marriage looks like. The books on our shelves move around quite often, because we read them so much, but this one in particular struck me.

Some of the books are mine, some are Marty's. I've read some of his, he's read some of mine. We just like to read. I've gone through ups and downs of reading in the past. Then I got on a genre kick and read alot of the same types of books for many years.

Enter Marty. Since we're not a gift-on-Valentines Day kind of family, I thought this picture was gift enough. The growth, openness, truth and fiction that this picture portrays to me is a gift. The little bit of this and little bit of that that my life became almost 5 years ago when Marty and I started dated. The fun, the serious, and the not so great. I just love what this little bookshelf says to me.

Now off to take all the doors off the kitchen cabinets.. Hopefully I'll get it done before hubby reads this, lol :)

HAPPY VALENTINE'S DAY SWEET PEA! love you!

There was an old woman.... That sat above the toilet.

2011-02-03T11:53:00.004-06:00

Faith finally discovered the 'creepy woman' today. We've been home 2 weeks today, and I'm surprised it took her this long to find her.

We got the woman statue as a hand-me-down, and couldn't figure out where to put her.. We were young and just married and as a joke, I thought it would be funny to put her up on the cabinet above the toilet, as if she were 'peeking' on everyone... It was just a joke, but here we are, 4 years later, and she's still there. I think for several of those years, I've completely forgotten about her. She's never been dusted, or cleaned, or cared for. I only seem to remember she's there when some comes out of the bathroom saying "What's with the creepy woman above the toilet?"

Faith's been pretty good at following Deken's lead. Since both my kids came home potty-trained, for Faith, it was just a matter of learning the whole 'bathroom routine' (turn on light, go potty, wipe, flush, wash hands, turn off light, etc) Plus the investment of a taller stool for shortstuff over here.

(notice there are three stools... fun, huh? The new tall one for Faith, is too tall for Deken, so I had to keep his stool there too. And Faith needs one for the toilet, but couldn't move the big one, so she has a little one that she keeps next to the toilet and moves back and forth, every time she has to go... It's a whole big fiasco, but it works for us, for now, until the peanut grows a bit, lol.. moving on....)

Since about the 3rd day we had been home, she's been able to go to the bathroom all on her own, without my help (yeah for a 2nd quick learner!). Only every once and a while does she call for help when she can't get the soap to come out... But today! Oh boy... was I laughing big time...

After asking to go to the bathroom, she went on her way down the hall, and all was quiet for about 3 minutes. Then the whimpering came. Then it started getting louder, and I wondered what she could have gotten in to now..... As I made my way down the hall, she came running out, pants down, screaming! Even at that sight, I started laughing, which I know is mean, but I couldn't fathom what the heck was causing my half naked child to run in fret!

I walked her back to the bathroom and peered in asking what was wrong. She sheepishly hid behind me, looked around my leg into the bathroom, and with her little finger pointing up said, " Mommy, Jjaja!" and then quickly buried her face in my leg.

HAHA! I couldn't stop laughing. I looked down at her and saw such a mass of confusion in her eyes, I knew I was stuck figuring out a way to explain this one to her.... oh boy!

I climbed up the stool and reached for, none other than, the famous 'creepy woman'.

I know, I know, she is kind of creepy. But I seriously had forgotten about her up there, for years! Deken's never noticed her either. After bringing her down off the shelf and dusting her off, Faith let out a wail and yet again ran out of the bathroom, down the hall with her pants down. I ever so cautiously hoaxed her back and picked her up in my lap. I tried to explain to her that the woman wasn't real. She stopped crying but still wasn't buying it... I tried knocking on the woman's head, saying "not real". Somehow that was going over either. I had to settle for explaining that the woman was a Nice Woman, and it's ok. I showed Faith her pretty necklace and after a little more hoaxing got her to run her hand around the creepy woman's fake pearls... She then gave the woman a kiss and smiled, followed by a "Mommy, ganda!" as she pointed back to the top of the shelf...

So, up the woman went, back to her dusty shelf (maybe I'll get to that one of these days...) and Faith smiled and continued on her way. She made a very deliberate point of telling me all about the woman and her necklace the next time we went to the bathroom, but she seemed content.. Hopefully she will soon forget she's there.. just like I did....

Now to go work on some storytime. As I type this, Deken is sitting on the couch reading Stuart Little, as Faith sits next to him reading my sewing machine manual... There's never a dull moment over here!

There's 4 of us now....

2011-01-10T02:13:00.002-06:00

I'd post a picture, but the internet is giving me a hard time.... But, there's 4 of us now. We couldn't be happier.

I know it's only been 10 days, but I'm already having trouble remembering what it was like as just 3 of us.

Oh yah, I forgot, I can just picture home and I remember. But soon my memories disappear and I can start to see the 4 of us at home, even though we haven't been there yet.

I wonder if Deken pictures home and thinks that when we go back he will still have it all to himself. He's different now. He's taller, and slender. He looks 3 years older than I remember. He's still learning the "help your sister" aspect, but he really gets the "go play with your sister part". Sometimes much better than I had imagined. They seem to be in tandem, the two of them, one right after the other, just switching off who the leader is, 24/7.

I don't think I ever had a better understanding of the whole "following God's Plan" thing, until I saw my TWO children together on the first day, for the first time. It was as if they knew each other all along. Within minutes they were calling each other by name, and playing together with their toys. 10 days later, it's still the same. They play together, sit together, share food, and teach each other new things, all day everyday.

Even when they wake up before mom and dad, they play quietly in their bed together, whispering and giggling, as if it were Christmas morning, and they knew what was soon to come. We've never asked them to be quiet in the morning. We never told them to whisper when they wake up. We never told them they have to stay in their bed. They just do it. They appreciate the little moments together in the morning, just them. They love it. And so do I.

I'm sure there is more to come. The failure to share. The yelling at each other. The pushing, the shoving. The typical sibling rivalry. But so far, I'm enjoying the peace. The relaxation. The fact that we can give them something to do, and an hour later they are still entertained amazes me. Best practices start from the beginning, and we've had a pretty awesome one of those.

Still figuring out a few things to come home. We should know more sometime this week. I hope it's sooner, rather than later, before the peace of being brother and sister ends!!

Happy Birthday Deken!

2010-12-30T14:29:00.001-06:00

I tried for 20 grueling minutes yesterday to get Deken to tell me what he wanted for Breakfast on his birthday..... At first I don't think he was understanding that I was asking for TOMORROW's breakfast, because when I first asked he went and sat at the table like he was waiting to eat, even though he had just had lunch 20 minutes before...

Then, after going through the whole "what's tomorrow mean" thing, he finally said "I want Sausage and Noodles please" hrumph.... Well, sausage and noodles is a dinner thing, and none of which I had on hand, which is odd, because that's what Deken asks for everyday for each meal.. You'd think I'd have the supplies on hand at all times....

Then I tried to hoax him with a " But it's your birthday, and you get to have something special for breakfast" After that, all I got out of him was "Um, I'd like some candles mom" Ugh...

At this point I realized that I probably had to list some things for him. "Deken, you can have pancakes with chocolate chips, or mommy can make you eggies, or we can go to a restaurant and have breakfast? Any of those?" (Slow shaking head)... Really? Not even Chocolate Chip Pancakes! Dad's not even home!!!

At this point Deken got up and slowly walked through the kitchen looking around. Until he found it. He looked at me, and looked at the box, and then looked at me again and pointed. Really? That's what you want for your special birthday breakfast? A poptart?

Mind you he has a poptart basically everyday for breakfast.... (and by poptart I mean the whole grain organic with the slightest bit of sugar kind from Costco).. I said "A poptart?" And I got something along the lines of:

"WOOWHOO (Rocky arms in the air) Yeah Poptart and Yogurt! (I always give him a probiotic yogurt in the morning too) Woo Deken's Birthday!"

Followed by Deken so desperately trying to get three fingers in the air... He's got two, and he can do 5 and 1, but 3 looks pretty arthritic... So he gave up, winked and eye, shot a thumbs up and said "Oh yah poptart" But nice try big boy. We're getting there goofball..

So, against my will, this morning I woke Deken up singing Happy Birthday, holding a cherry pomegranate poptart with a candle on top. As I was singing he even had the nerve to say "Mom hurry, I want to blow the candle out!" Really kid?

I can't believe that 18 months ago Daddy and I had no children, and now we have a big 3 yr old and a sweet 2 yr old. Unbelievable to me... And the sweetest present of all today was that the US G*v told us that we can bring your sister home. :)

What's that? Popcorn for lunch? Ok... I guess I can manage that...

Happy Birthday Sweet Boy!

(UN)Requested Prayer

2010-12-21T14:57:00.002-06:00

When I lay fast asleep in my bed each night, a young man in Uganda is awake. Working.Laboring.Preaching. A priest with a soft voice but a strong message.

A man, that without me knowing it, prays for me and my family, when he doesn't even know we need it. His words are powerful. And they are FOR me... His words are eloquent, encouraging, and full of praise to our King. And they are FOR me...

This morning Marty and I needed something really big to happen. It was super important. We prayed hard that it would work out, and chose to rely on God's grace for it to be so. We were incredibly blessed by a small miracle this morning, and can now take the next step to bringing our sweet baby girl home!

This afternoon, while checking through all my emails I found an email from my saving grace. 15 hours before our 'big thing' this morning. He wished us a Merry Christmas, and told us that he was praying for us today.

He prays for me, when I need it most, and he doesn't even know it.. What an incredible friendship Marty and I have been blessed with, in this wonderful man that thinks of us and prays for us. Just.Because.

Did I mention, it's because of this great man, that Marty and I went to Uganda last year in the first place? A trip where we met our son? Setting a path that, a year later, brought us a wonderful daughter?

Today I'm so thankful for the little miracles that God brings us. After our big accomplishment this morning, I told a sweet friend how thankful I was, that God not only provides for our needs, but surpasses our needs, with everything He's got... Just.Because.

I'm so behind on my surpassing... He shows me how each and every day. He shows a sweet priest, 8,000 miles away the same. I.Am.So.Blessed. I don't deserve it.

In 8 wonderful days, my family of 3 will be getting on a plane finally. And in a few short weeks will be coming home a family of 4.

So.Very.Blessed.

Skipping Christmas

2010-12-12T11:52:00.001-06:00

I absolutely love this movie... Actually, it started as a book called Skipping Christmas by John Grisham. I read the book first, but I knew a movie was coming out and who the actor's were going to be, so it was really hard to read the book and not picture the actors saying everything. It was still a hilarious book, and I watch the movie every Christmas season. Love it!

However, I never thought I would say "We're skipping Christmas this year" Ok, well, we're not totally skipping Christmas.... We're just not decorating... We've bought presents (frugally) and we're attending all the Christmas parties, and we've been talking up the birth of baby Jebus to Deken like crazy. But there's no tree in our house, or lights out side. No swags on the mantle or garland in the archways.... Just two little elf candle holders on the table that were a gift from the other day and Deken and I cut out some snowflakes and a snowman from some coffee filters, to hang in the windows....

The reason? We think we will be in Uganda for Christmas (YEAH!) We're not for sure yet, still planning, but Deken's passport arrived the other day (yes, he's coming with us!!!) and we are on the last leg of our 'approvals wait'. We are soooo hoping to be together, as a family of FOUR for Christmas....

We're not sure it will all work out (flights to Uganda at Christmas? Yikes!) But either way, it will be very soon, and we thought that lugging out the millions of Christmas boxes, from the already frozen attic, would be too much this year... Plus, we don't know how long we will be gone, and we don't want to come back to a dead and decaying tree with droopy decorations all over.. (yuck for cleaning up!)

Please pray for a speedy ending to our wait! It's so hard to hear "Your baby girl needs her Mommy" and not be able to jump on a plane that day to go get her.... Soon though, very soon... I can't believe it's December 12th already! We could be holding and tickling our baby girl in 2 weeks!!! Ugh! I can't wait!!!!

So long Christmas decorations.... This year there is a little girl about yeah high (imagine the arm motion) that is so much more important than you! (insert squishy face with tongue sticking out and a little nah-nah nah nah nah-nah)

Merry Christmas!!!!!!!

~K

Bittersweet

2010-10-23T12:39:00.000-05:00

There were a few 'bittersweets' this week...

First, of course, leaving home, my husband and my son, yet coming here to UG to be with my daughter..

Then there was, finally being with my daughter, yet convincing her that I'm not a stranger.. hmm. that was a toughy. Thankfully it only lasted a few hours.

This week was also the one year anniversary of Deken's homecoming to America. Yet... I was here in UG, and not with him.

Now I have been here a whole week, and have had an amazing week getting to know this little bundle of joy of mine. Yet, I think I officially miss my other bundle at home. I missed him all along, but I don't think it was until I truly started to have fun and laugh and giggle with my little girl, on a regular basis, that I now realize how much I miss it at home too.

My little girl started calling me Mommy yesterday. Before she used to swat at me and pat my leg to get my attention. Now she sticks her face in mine and says "Mommy?" Yet, it sounds different. Their voices are different. Their reflection is different. If I was standing in a large crowd with Deken, I would recognize if he was calling me, over the rest in the room. Now I have to listen for two sounds... I love it, but hope I pay attention!

This week I had to do everything and anything to help my daughter settle with me... Now we are starting to transition a bit. It's for the best, but I kind of miss some of it... She now will sit in her own chair to eat, yet it was kind of fun having her in my lap. And a two days ago I got her to sleep in her own bed. Tonight I got her to fall asleep on her own, instead of rocking her to sleep for 30 min. It was a sweet time this past week rocking her to sleep... But I'm glad we're past the screaming when I try to lay her down! Tonight I laid her down first, and she stroked my face a bit, and then drifted off to sleep. Progress! I've been one tired momma this week.

Our moments have been sweet. Some of them a bit bitter... I'm so proud of her progress... yet sad that in just one week, I'm already watching her grow up and change so fast!

Out to the village tomorrow!

~K

Sometimes

2010-10-20T13:46:00.001-05:00

My little girl is 23 months old. Sometimes I think she is 5, maybe 6, maybe my age....

She's sweet and funny, and super tiny, but living much older than any 23 month old should have to. She wants to feed me and sweep the floors. She always gives me her last bite. She squeezes and holds me tight, then looks at my face and brushes the hair behind my ears. If the strap on my tank falls off my shoulder she puts it back up for me. If my shoes are on the floor she brings them to me and puts them on my feet. I'm also pretty sure she tried to fluff my pillow last night.

I'm told by the people I'm staying with that she speaks better Lugunda than most 5 year olds. She understands my English, but can only respond in Lugunda.. After about 5 hours with me, I think she knew I couldn't understand her. She started taking me by the hand to show me things, and pointing. Sometimes while she's playing in the other room, she looks up at me, puts her toys down and runs to me to kiss my forehead. Something a Mother would do while passing through a room, laundry basket in hand.

She tries to scratch my freckles off. Today she took the end of a comb and tried to clean my toes with it. She picks fuzz out of my hair all day long. While I was laying on the bed reading she brought me a bottle of lotion. I opened it and put some in her hands, and then to my surprise she rubbed it all over my leg. Then she shook the bottle at me to open again and proceeded with my other leg. When she was done, she put the bottle back on the table and went back to trying on the rest of her clothes (for the third day in a row). Sometimes I can't help myself, but to let her do these things. I've learned so much about her in just 3 days. Sometimes I just want to cry... Today she was picking her teeth from the pork we had at dinner, and then she tried to feed it to me... /Sometimes I forget that there was a time when she didn't have enough food to eat.. yet she still tried to give me her 'left overs'....

Sometimes I wonder how a child so young, could feel so much responsibility? Sometimes I stop to think "Why doesn't she run around like a crazy child, play with toys screaming and yelling? Sometimes I want to cry when she picks up the napkin at dinner and wipes my face with it.... Sometimes I want to cry when she stands in front of me and starts her own little interpretive dance... Had she gone that long without toys that she would rather wiggle around than hug and rock a baby doll to sleep? Sometimes I forget that she's only 23 months old. She may only be about 25 inches tall, but she stands about 25 miles high.

Sometimes I wonder why God put me on this path to be her mother. What is it about me that HE thinks is going to be able to help this strong little girl, learn how to be a little kid? How do you teach a child to be a child? I've never known more patience in my entire life than I have seen in myself these last 3 days... I never knew I was capable of something like this. I already know what's best for her, and I've only known her three days. I already can comfort her. I already have taught her that when I say NO, I mean business. I've already taught her that when she hurts, she can come to me. I have to just keep telling myself that God thinks I am the only person in this world that can be her Mother.. But how do I teach her that the weight of the world is not on shoulders? Oy vey...

Say a little prayer for my little girl tonight... Pray that I can show her that someday she will be a little girl, and just that. And pray for my husband and little boy.. I miss them and their hugs so much...

Goodnight from Uganda
~K

Ever done a Soup Wash?

2010-05-17T18:47:00.001-05:00

Of course not, I made that up myself... But maybe you've tried a Soup Wash, and don't even know it yet!

Trying to eat as Organic as we can has managed to be somewhat of a challenge... Our lovely local grocery store has actually been very helpful, in that they are starting to incorporate more and more organic products, everytime I visit. Thanks! I'm sure they are doing it especially for me, as I am probably their #1 organic shopper :)

However, the anti-recipe follower that I am, I'm finding it hard to come up with things to make, while avoiding non-organic products... My solution? The Soup Wash.

Anyone that knows me well or has eaten in my house knows that I will make anything into a soup. I'm a huge soup fan, and I usually get nominated for fruit or soup type products for just about every holiday. Well, I thought I would share my latest craze.. Now, I must warn you, I am no stranger to the 'can'. I actually like many things that come in a can. Green beans, Water chestnuts, Diced tomotoes, Sweet corn, and my ever favorite Tomato Bisque Soup. (all organic of course).

I try and have at least one night of the week to do something light, like soup and bread side, sometimes my ever favorite oyster crackers. Lately, with schedules filling up (and a minor ache/pain that has landed me on the couch for the past week) I've had to be a little more creative to cater to the ever present "Lack of Time"

So trying to be creative in throwing together quick, ORGANIC (anyone who cooks organic knows that it's alot of work..) meals, in a bind one day I ended up opening up a can of organic mexican soup, pouring it into a strainer, rinsing everything off, tossing with some brown rice, and some mexican seasoning. Hmmm.. Mexican rice in about 12 minutes.. Ok lets try this again. Organic can of vegetable bisque soup, washed, tossed with whole grain pasta, italian seasoning and gruyere cheese. Hmm 8 minutes huh?

Today: Wolfgang Puck's Organic Thick Hearty Vegetable, washed and strained, tossed with organic diced tomatoes, organic canned green beans, organic rustic italian dressing, and slices of mozzarella, chilled for 3 hours, as a side for our organic pesto tortellini and homemade pita chips. 15 minutes huh?

I think I'm on to something! While I love cooking organic and from scratch, it's really hard sometimes to start the preparations 3 hours before dinner time everyday...

Anyone else tried this before? I'd love to swap ideas! :)

Walking on Water?

2010-05-17T15:33:00.001-05:00

haha!?! Are you kidding me?!?!!

Paradise in the Midwest

2010-03-31T15:46:00.001-05:00

Deken could not BE more in heaven right now.... What could possibly be better than taking a good ole nap, outside in the fresh air! I got back from a nice long walk to find that Deken hadn't lasted as long as I did, so I decided to just let him nap in his stroller, rather than disturb him..

*Notice even while napping, he still refuses to take off the shades..

When he finally woke up he was still acting all crazy at the fact that he had SHORTS on... haha he thinks it's funny, but keeps grabbing his shins and saying "Mommy! LEGS!!"

With the weather jumping past 70 degrees today it was AWESOME to break out of the sweatpants and sweatshirts, and into the SHORTS AND TSHIRTS!! Even Elmo and Cookie Monster got to come outside and play!

DISCLAIMER: Dad I apologize for the SOX shorts. This display today is not associated with and does not and/or solidify that we will be promoting, cheering for, or raising Deken as a SOX fan. They are the only pair of shorts Deken has (thanks poppy!).. Again, I apologize, and claim irresponsible parenting, for not having purchased cubby blue on and/or before today (i.e warm enough to wear shorts). Cheers!

2 going on 22

2010-03-22T11:48:00.000-05:00

With the first signs of spring upon us, Deken and I kind of abandoned our daily routines, to spend some quality time exploring outside! Poor thing had gone from 80 degrees and sunny weather everyday, to 3ft of snow for 4 months... I've never seen a kid more excited to be outside!

So everyday last week, we took stroller walks, trips the park, a walk to McDonalds for Shamrock Shakes on St. Patty's Day (a must tradition) and riding bikes around the neighborhood. However, everyday he was a little curious about all that grass on the other side of the big glass window in the kitchen.. I was hesitant to take him in the backyard, which would be ok because it's fenced, but we have a large slope and it's been nothing but puddles and mud from all the snow melting....

But I'm a sucker for Deken's curiosity. I always try to let Deken pursue his curious interests (with mom helping to caution) so finally, by Thursday it was dry enough to let Deken venture to the backyard to discover what was out there. And in light of Deken's "I'm-two-and-can-do-it-myself New-Found-Independence" I let him chose a few toys and explore the yard all by himself.. Well kind of.. Mom couldn't help be peek out the kitchen window every once and a while.. Was happy to find:

First I got all my toys ready and lined up. Making sure Buzz and Woody have a front row seat.

Then I checked out some bubbles

Hmm, then I saw some other kids playing across the street and tried to show them my toys

And finally I took a tour of the rest of the yard on my cool motorcycle

So glad my little man loves being outside, because our family def spends alot of time out there! I'm also really glad that he's on the right road to being adventurous! No TV Drone kids in this family! :)

YEAH that S-P-R-I-N-G is FINALLY here!!

40=4x3=12x12=?

2010-03-09T13:48:00.001-06:00

Does my math seem right?

of course not..... to you... But it does to me!

40 laps
=4 miles
x 3 days a week
= 12 miles walked a week
x 12 weeks
= ? lbs!

Well... I'm not so brave as to 'weigh in' but I will tell how many lbs I lose in the end! 2 days of my 1st week are done already, and I'm already 2 lbs down!

So that's my plan. And here are a few fun things to note about my experience at the gym so far.

*There's no spitting on the track. They like to enforce this by hanging up pictures of whales shooting water out their blow whole and saying "No Spitting" I think a camel might have been a little better analogy...

* 95% of people over the age of 65 at my gym think that blue jeans are great workout pants.

* 95% of people over the age of 65 at my gym have an Ipod, and this 27 yr old still does not..

* I'm sorry sir, even though many people in your age category think that jeans are great athletic attire, I would definitely have to argue your choice of chorduroy pants on the jogging track... I think they can here you coming 4 blocks away..

* I think the subject of tires on an RV is a nice topic of conversation. But I'm having trouble understanding that it's interesting enough to last from lap 3 to lap 22...

* Yes miss spandex, we all can see that your figure is beyond unbelievable. But really, is it necessary that you stand and do your stretches right in my path, and coincidently when the mens basketball begins? I think the direction in which you choose to face is a little obvious, and I definitely saw that wedding ring on your finger when you walked in...

*Dear Mr. Gym manager, if you want me to continue to be motivated to come to the gym and workout, I'm requesting that you move the vending machines away from the front door of the building, and maybe provide a dress code for those who's 'sagging skin' hangs longer than my shoulder length hair. Can they please cover it up, or tuck it in somewhere, so that I can avoid the need to vomit while walking on your track? Just a suggestion.

*Jackie Chan apparently is a member of my gym, and by his moves with that punching back, I'm guessing he doesn't do his own stunts in his movies... Which I thought he did...

*Hey Mr. little kids soccer coach. I think you need to spend less time flirting with the semi-hot mom and more time with the kids. Have you noticed that everytime the kids run down to the other goal (and you turn to talk to that mom) they show each other their belly buttons, and little Eddie tried to look down Joshua's pants? I'm pretty sure one of the times the word "P*nis came out...

*Hey, referee from when I played basketball at this gym 18 years ago. Seriously? You're still here refereeing?? And I'm pretty sure you are wearing the same shoes too... weird..

Hopefully more fun exciting gym sightings soon to come! Day 3 of this week is Thursday! :)

Haiti

2010-02-22T21:38:00.000-06:00

Awesome video. Very cool!

Why I'll never own a snowblower...

2010-02-10T10:39:00.004-06:00

I've never had the luxury of knowing what it's like to park my car in a garage.. I went from my parents driveway, to a parking lot @ school, to an alley by my apartment, back to my parents driveway, and now my driveway...

Until we build a garage (ours was converted into a room) our cars hang out in the driveway. Yesterday with the foot of snow that came, I was thankful that Marty was actually HOME for a snow storm. Typically he 'happens' to be out of town when we get slammed with snow, and I'm either stuck shoveling alone, or not going anywhere and the snow just piles up. But yesterday Marty was actually home, so we went out after dinner and shoveled together.

While I was a bit peeved when after I had bundled myself up trudged out there and shoveled a few rows, Marty THEN suggested that I clear off the cars and move them so we can shovel what's around them. So I had to trudge back inside, take my snowy stuff off get the keys, put my snowy stuff back on and trudge back out (which I had to do twice because the first time I couldn't find either set of keys and had to go outside and ask Marty, who had his headphones on so I had to put everything back on, just to walk down to the end of the driveway to ask him, come back, take off, etc) But all said and done, it all got done much faster than when one of us has to do it alone. And I'm very systematic, so conquering a task like that is always fun for me.

But it makes me appreciate my relationship with Marty so much. We do grocery shopping together, gardening, household stuff, etc. We like working together on stuff. I don't want to be one of those couples that 'she does the shopping and he pays the bills.' That's no fun... So, I don't think we'll ever own a snowblower. It's tough labor shoveling the driveway, but we do it together, and the labor part helps us to stay humble in knowing that we should appreciate the fact that we have able bodies that can shovel the driveway. 2 months living in Kampala, trudging up and down hilly streets with bags and sometimes a 30 pound kid on my back or hip in 90 degree heat, was great fun. That's how most of the people there live everyday! I think I'm capable of shoveling the snow with my husband 20 times a year.

Plus, we won't have to do it forever. We'll eventually be able to just make the kids do it. haha

One darn good, half of an Eclair

2010-02-09T20:37:00.003-06:00

I put my kid to bed crying tonight. Not me crying, but him....

First I have to admit, we have it really easy with Deken. He doesn't throw tantrums, he doesn't act out in public. He's all around a pretty happy kid. The only times we ever see him cry is when he gets hurt, or when he's woken up the one or two times since we've been home, which we are suspecting is from some sort of nightmare. Lately he gets a little teary-eyed if he has an 'accident', but then he quickly runs to the bathroom, and he's over it.

But tonight.....this was different. Something Marty and I haven't seen. It's hard being a first-time parent to a two year old. We don't always know what to expect, and when it's coming. And we for sure don't know how to handle them all.

I know some of you may laugh, and think what I'm about to tell you is nothing big at all. I've heard stories of tantrums in the grocery store and fits in restaurants, so this may not be big for you, but it was for me. But in a good way. So here goes....

We're not a dessert-after-dinner-kinda-family. We just don't do it. We try to eat healthy, filling meals, and I'm one of those 'makes from scratch' moms/wives. Tonight I made homemade potstickers with a side of broccoli dipped in soy. Some of you that know where we live, might know that we were pummelled with snow today, so we planned on taking Deken outside after dinner to play in the snow while Marty and I shoveled the driveway. But Marty had a quick phone call he had to make and said he needed about 10 minutes. So I decided to give Deken half of a chocolate eclair we got from Marty's dad yesterday.

To my knowledge this was Deken's first chocolate eclair, and he seemed to be thoroughly enjoying it quite a bit. I even got a little video of him diving into it, just hoping to grab the moment when he squeezes down and custard shoots out the back. When it did, he took a towel and wiped it up, and continued to shove the rest in his mouth.

Now, to back track a bit, we are a very manners-driven family. We say please and thank you, we give hugs and kisses goodbye, we put our own garbage in the trash can, we clean up our toys when we're done with them, we wait our turn, we know whinning is bad, and Deken will even say "yes mommy" or "yes daddy" when we ask him to do something. We believe that starting to instill these values in Deken when he's young, will help him to grow up to have a great foundation of respect. Remember, we're 18 months behind in raising him, so we're kinda just starting everything at once.

I was so excited the day that Deken learned the concept of saying please. I tried not to give in everytime he used the term, but you get so proud of your kid when they do, and they do it right. In the instances that he asks for something nicely, and I have to decline, I try to always explain to him why, and then Thank him for asking so nicely. So far so good. He usually looks sad for about 3 seconds, and then he moves on.

Today however, not so well done. As he finished the last of his half of a chocolate eclair, he picked up the bowl and directed it to me and said "More chocolate please Mommy" Marty and I laughed and I looked at him and smiled saying "No more chocolate hunny, all done. Just one today"

And here went the water works. But not the screaming, fighting kind. It welled up slowly, and then a little cry came out. But it was the same "I fell down and bit my tongue" cry. I was confused. We tried reasoning with him several times. Nothing. He really had this look on his face as if he was really sad and hurt by not getting more.

We were at a loss. We want to be sure to always raise him with standards, limits, and boundries. We DEFINITELY know that we can't give in when he cries. But this was hard. He looked like we hurt his feelings., not like he was just being whinny and selfish. After a few minutes, and his apparent opposition to understanding that he can't have anymore (everytime I said the word chocolate his cry peaked a bit), we had no other choice but to tell him that it was time for bed. No, he wouldn't be going outside to play in the snow. Being greedy and not grateful isn't going to go over well in the Duffy house...

He cried all the way down to the bathroom, all during his time in the bathroom (not a screaming cry, but more of a soft, teary, sad cry, with a few hiccups in between) and all the way to his room. We calmly and quietly got him dressed for bed, both gave him a hug, laid him down and closed the door.

We looked at each other, a bit shocked, not knowing what to make of it. We know for sure that we agree on not having given him more chocolate. That just seemed as though it would open up a whole new side of Deken, where he would think that he could cry to get what he wants. But I was torn however with how to get him to stop. I really had a hard time keeping myself from consoling him... But I truely felt as though I couldn't, because we wanted to do everything we could to not encourage his behavior. His crying was unacceptable to us, yet a bit un-nerving as well. I'm leary as to what is to come as I see him slowly developing in his young 2's.. But confident that as long as Marty and I work together, we'll be alright.

But boy, this was def an unexpected event.. I really had to hold myself from laughing. If you knew us, and knew Deken, you probably would want to laugh too.

los

2010-02-08T10:52:00.001-06:00

Man this guy is good....

Silence

2010-01-29T16:09:00.004-06:00

I've spent the last three months in silence.....

No, I don't mean silent on my blog (well yes, that has been a little silent lately) But I mean real silence. The music has been off.

Adoption is hard.. It takes alot out of you. Especially since Deken is my first child... And he's two years old already. Where was I supposed to start?

My whole life I have relied heavily on music. I basically always have music playing, did mostly music related activities growing up, and played every instrument in the band. Funny, coming from a person that doesn't even own an ipod... but I just love music... And I do it 'old school' with the plain old radio (no satelite thingamajig), tapes and CD's.... sometimes even records..

But since I came home from Uganda with Deken I've been silent. Something inside of me just wanted it to be quiet. Some of you might think "How could it possibly be quiet in her house? She has a two year old!" Well, I do that surprisingly well. He's basically an extension of myself, so what he does and says is just reality (the sound of the washing machine, furnace, coffee maker, police sirens, cell phone ringing)... I hear it, yet I don't. I listen, but it's not loud. But the music was off.

Even my husband thought it was weird, especially because I'm home all day now and he knows I always had music playing before. "You don't want the music on? That's so weird..." is what he said... I don't know. I just wanted it quiet....

Well, today Deken and I mastered glue. He's sitting at the table right now with popsicle sticks, crayons, cotton balls and a bowl of glue, just getting messy and being a boy....

I am about to tackle the mound of dishes all over my kitchen..........

and I just turned the music on.....

Ode to the Jamba

2009-07-16T14:33:00.007-05:00

At Christmas time, Marty and I decided to buy the most wonderful juicer. With our health becoming a top priority this year, with impeding children on the way, we thought a juicer would be a good start to going Au Natural. It's done wonders, and we absolutely love it! I can't wait til our kids can have fresh juice ever morning! And we save from not having to buy 2-3 plastic juice bottles a week!

After a few weeks we started to get a little more creative. I started making lemonade for when people came over, and they love it! One of my many nieces was watching me make juice one day and said "What are you making?" and I said "Lemonade" She says "WHAT? Like that?" When I questioned her surprise she concluded by saying "Well, my mom said that lemonade comes from a little packet. Lemonade is really just this powder stuff"

Oh really? haha, oh the innocence of child....

Then, after our successful lemonade, we moved on to Smoothies! Jamba juice usually becomes a pretty big part of our summer month routine, so we thought we would branch out and try it ourselves! (actually... we went to Jamba Juice and bought a smoothie book..) Our Smoothies turn out pretty good! Thanks Breville. You make a wonderful juicer.

In an ode to my addiction to freshley squeezed juice, I made a trip to the creator myself today. The girl behind the counter must have known of course that I'm traveling all the way to Africa in 5 days and have been running around crazy, loosing my mind, and she musts have also known that tomorrow was my last day of work and the wonderful people at the office threw me a lovely party this morning, so knowing all of that she said "I know it's your lucky day! I charged you for a small but I made you a medium! Just for you!"

She's so smart :) I love my Jamba.....

Superstitions....

2009-06-24T14:12:00.004-05:00

So...... When you walk out to your car in the morning and their is Bird poop on your door handle... Isn't that supposed to be saying something? Isn't there a superstition out there about Bird poop on your door handle? You know, like if your right hand itches, money is coming your way?

Well, I def. didn't have an itchy right hand this morning... But I did have the bird poop thing.....

me

2009-06-17T14:41:00.000-05:00

Tell me I’m forgiven and loved ‘Cause I hear it from the street corner priests On how God is love and how man can be clean But my joy has been on holiday And my peace has almost passed away Tell me I’m forgiven and free

I tried and tried to rectify my hopeless situation But I bought the lie I still have work to do Now I’m working nine to five like I can earn my own salvation But there is no condemnation in You

Whisper to me now that it’s for real ‘Cause in the silence of these walls righteousness lost its appeal Dirty deeds have done me in
But that can’t stop the faithful friend Giving mercy once again as You heal Here it is I’m feeling it

He died, He died to rectify my hopeless situation And His blood commands my guilt to leave Now on Calvary I stand Empty pockets, open hands
There is no condemnation for me

Child, you’re forgiven and loved Child, you’re forgiven and loved Child, you’re forgiven And child, you are loved Child, you’re forgiven and loved

~JN

he's just not that in to you....

2009-06-08T22:35:00.003-05:00

haha. Just a quick note to say; "he's just not that in to you"

JK- But this movie was def. worth the watch. PG-13 and I thought it really was PG-13. I would like my teenage child watch it; had alot of good things in it. I laughed, I cried, I was pleasantly surprised and pleased.

Give it a try! Thought it was exceptionally funny that my 19 yr old cousin was telling me tonight that she "has a new bf" found it fitting that I told her "he's just not that in to you" as a joke because I happen to be watching it. Sure it prob. freaked her out. Sorry Joc! Don't worry, I'm sure he's in to you. lol

Rent it, watch it, funny flick!

~Kathryn

No shirt No shoes, service?

2009-06-02T16:57:00.003-05:00

Funny story from my Husband on the road last night....

My husband, Marty, is working in an undisclosed area of the United States this week, as he often travels, and had quite an enteraining encounter in the gas station...

He said that he had a few things to work on in the evening in his hotel room, so he stopped to get a little six pack of beer to accompany him. Now, we're trying to do the 'green thing' and he felt that it wasn't necessary for the clerk to put his six pack into a bag, since it has a handle.. Yet, the clerk Insisted! He was told that he could not carry a six pack of beer around if it was not disclosed in a paper or plastic bag.. Fine, he said, and took the bag.

He shrugged it off and turned around to leave when he noticed the nice young gentleman behind him was not wearing a shirt! In the store! With a confused look on his face we walked out of the store, to pass yet a second gentleman who was not wearing a shirt and entering the store!

Strange how you can't carry a six pack of beer 'naked' but you can buy it without a shirt on!

I love you hunny! Hang in there! Good thing we don't live in THAT state! (which shall remain nameless...)

I Needham

2009-05-29T12:42:00.001-05:00

Oh, good ole Jimmy...

Have you heard of Jimmy Needham? Check him out.

It's such a beautiful day in Chicago today. I greatly enjoyed my commute with Jimmy this morning :)

http://www.jimmyneedham.com

We're Back!

2009-05-11T10:23:00.000-05:00

And we brought the weather with us!! lol sorry.....

Pictures soon to come of the Motherland!

Muffin Tops and Dried up Mascara

2009-05-01T09:04:00.003-05:00

You know how the top of a muffin is always the best part? Well now they actually make "muffin top" pans... You fill just a little bit of muffin, and you basically just get the top. I think the concept is amazing! I'd like to apply this concept to my mascara..... For some reason, when I get to the end of the tube, and it's starting to get crusty and old (and I know I only have like a week or two left with it) my eyelashes look so much better! It's just subtley enough color, and it spreads them out really nicely. Do you know where I could buy used mascara? preferably the 'end of the tube' kind?

And how come (I have kinda wavy hair) when I let me hair curl for a day, the next day when I straighten it, it looks fantastic! But if I straighten it on the third day, it looks crappy again.. I basically have to plan ahead. (thought bubble) "Ok, so I want to straighten my hair for the party on saturday so I should let it curl like thursday and friday of that week"

And how come, when it's time for a haircut, and I'm at my wits end with my hair for days and days, just anxiously awaiting for the day to come when I'm scheduled for a haircut, and then that morning my hair does everything I want it to, and looks fantastic! I don't think I've ever had a hair-cutting day that I didn't second guess getting my haircut. Why is that?

lol..... ahhh, the joys of Friday mornings...

Setting Sail for the Motherland

2009-04-30T09:42:00.002-05:00

Yep, we are setting sail this weekend. If you can't tell by our last name, the Motherland is referring to, none other than, Ireland.

Yep, we are in need of a vacation! Who isn't?! After a long year of ups and downs, many good and many not so good, we are taking a week to become adventurer's! We've got nothing but plane tickets and a car rental, and a couple of Wal-Mart backpacks. Yes my friends, and adventure it will be!!

We got an awesome new camera for christmas, which will be nice an loaded up for our return! I'll be sure to snap a few of us sleepin in the car. With no reservations anywhere, I'm sure it's bound to happen at least one night! But pray that it doesn't!

In honor of the 250th anniversary of Guinness, we thought, what a perfect way to spend our 2nd anniversary. We also thought we would honor our favorite stout, and all of our wonderful wedding guests, by having a pint for everyone! Well........ we'll try, since we will be the only ones there to actually consume the 200 pints of Guinness, we'll try our best. We've been practicing!

We'll be back in a week! Erin Go Bragh!

Turn up your Hamm Radios...

2009-04-29T12:45:00.002-05:00

Really? 55 in the left lane?

Thank you so much for all those people out there that drive the actual speed limit here in the Chicagoland area. If I only had the courtesy to do the same.

I also applaud all of you that drive 55, even in the left lane. Although, I must also protest. There are some of us out there, that are not on our cell phones working while driving in the car. I would actually like to use the left lane for passing, and traveling a little faster, so that I can get to the office in a timely fashion to begin my work day. Those of you that choose to begin your work day in the car, please proceed to the right lanes of the tollway, where the slower traffic is. I'm tired of seeing you swerve in and out of your lane, because you are not paying attention. You are slowing down those of us that ARE paying attention.

I know it's no excuse that I was running late this morning (even though I make my own hours...) But sometimes you just have to get things off your chest... So attention all of you that fall into the categories above. Along with all of those that are doing their makeup in the car, messing with their GPS, out of towners (yes, you are very frustrating to Chicago drivers), and UPS trucks. Get out of the way please!! I don't care how slow you want to drive, just please GET OUT OF THE LEFT LANE!!

And thanks! I'll be leaving around 530pm today, if you all want to make a note of it. :)

A gift becomes a nightmare, nightmare comes true, and the truth becomes our dream..

2009-04-28T19:23:00.005-05:00

I’ve always been quite unique. I like what I like. I like special things, yet I like them plain. You see?

A week short of our 1^st 6 months dating, Marty got down on one knee, in his kitchen (as I was swearing at the wine bottle because I couldn’t get it open) and said something that I’ll never forget. I can’t forget something I didn’t hear right? As Marty I’m sure was saying, probably the most romantic thing he could ever say, I, 1- was swearing at the wine bottle 2- then asking him what he was doing on the floor 3- looking up and seeing his sister Maureen crying (why, I wasn’t sure) and 4- was hearing Marty’s mother, Mary, saying “He’s doing it right now? Frank, is he doing it right now?”

Seriously, I all of the sudden thought I was on an episode of Seinfeld and the Castanza’s were over for dinner…. But for as much as I would like to admit that it was lovely, I couldn’t hear what he said, and much time later, when I finally admitted I couldn’t hear what he had said, he couldn’t remember.. So hunny, I'm sorry I didn't get to hear what you had probably been going over in your head for weeks, and so thoughtfully prepared!!!!

But! My saying yes, had nothing to do with anything he would have said right then. I knew from the beginning we were going to get married. So amidst the confusion, he handed me the bag I was looking for (it was the doggies b-day and I asked him to get her a new collar on his way home) and dangling from the end of the new collar (black velvet with a cute little bow, good job Marty!) was my ring. At first I thought, “oh how cute, you found a collar with a pearl on it” But then after looking up at the Castanza’s and Mo crying in the background, I realized he was proposing, and that it was a ring for me! The perfect pearl I always wanted, surrounded by petals of diamonds. How crazy. I knew that ‘the one’ was truly going to be the one that actually listened when I hinted at wanting something other than a diamond. And here I had my perfect pearl gracing the center of my husbands eternal symbol of love and affection. The Perfect Pearl.

The perfect pearl that plagued me with nightmares for many months to come..... Each one bringing to life the fear of the pearl (with no prongs!) missing, and my never ending search for it’s safety. Everytime I awoke, I would run to the where my ring was placed, and check to make sure it was still there. Until one day, all became reality. Of all days, February 14^th of this year, we were throwing a couples Valentines day dinner, and I had just settled into the table, after hours of cooking and preparing. Finally, my first time to sit down and enjoy the company, and what do I find? A pearl’less’ ring… My nightmares had become reality. What made it worse? The thought that I had just prepared a 4 course dinner for 10 couples and then proceeded to throw hunks of ‘white’cheese, no less at our dogs for being such good sports. Oh heavens, it could have been anywhere…

Several days later, after much cleaning, a very unhappy couple we were. We made some phone calls and found that the pearl could easily be replaced. We were ok with that, but sadden that it wouldn't be 'the one' and we were also told that in the future, I should not where my ring everyday..

Thankfully, low and behold a few days later, after grabbing the last towel on the shelf in my bathroom ( which I had folded and put away just minutes before guests arrived for Valentines day), I hear this rolling sound. Just as if someone was rolling a quarter across a table. I turn back to see my pearl roll across the shelf, and without even realizing it, in my head I go “Dear Lord, please give me the patience I need today. I watched my husband put up this shelf, using a level, and yet something is rolling across this poor shelf. I know that there are more important things in life, than shelves being level, so please God, today, I need to be reminded of that” haha, then after a small chuckle I realize, It’s my pearl! I quickly recanted “Dear Lord! Thank you so much for my husband that can’t put up a level shelf!!! AMEN!”

I love you so much hunny!!!

Rainbow Falls

2009-04-24T13:09:00.011-05:00

Rainbow Falls

Yep, that’s where it all began. No, the Rainbows weren’t falling out of the sky.. And no, we weren’t at a waterfall with a rainbow bursting through the sunlight. It was actually… the local pool…
I know, sounds strange. Even more so, it was the concession stand at the local pool, Rainbow Falls. And no, it didn’t happen while standing in line (you could probably come up with some romantic story in your own head about falling in love in line for some nachos.. “While turning from the nacho line, one innocent chip began it’s freefall to the ground. She reached to save it, they both fumbled for the rescue, their hands touched, their eyes met!!!”) blah blah, not so.
I actually first saw him when my new manager (yes we both worked there) was handing me my nifty red (and incredibly over-sized) polo, just a few days after my 14th birthday. He had a big cheese stained the front if his shirt, and the guy next too him was throwing ice at another poor innocent girl, who was trying to take an order from a customer. Was this what I was about to get into? Sure mom! I’ll get a summer job! Wow, think of all the money I could make! Little did I know, the concession stand vet’s were going to do everything they could to sabotage you while you are trying to take orders…. I think on my first day, I too, had a big huge permanent cheese stain on the front of my ‘new’ shirt, a rip in the collar, and one of my hair clips was lost in the jalapeno jar… oops!
But yes, my future husband was apart of the shenanigan’s, and funny, now we had matching nacho cheese stains..
Little did I know, that the fun of the next few summers, was laying the ground work for what ended up in marriage, 11 years later…

To answer some questions: No, we haven’t been together that long. No, we never dated in High School. Yes, we lost touch for many years (Marty’s 2 years older than I), No, Marty wasn’t the sole instigator in us young girls being tortured in the concession stand (Hi Sprinkles!) Yes, I thought my husband was the most adorable thing on earth back then. No, I never told him that. And No! I never, on God’s green earth, would have imagined that 11 years later I would be marring him. WooWhoo!

So Rainbow Falls.. What a wonderful place.. After sometime, it turned out to be a great place! And I’ve made some incredible, everlasting friends and memories. Sprinkles you ask? Well, that’s just what our niece calls him (she couldn’t ever remember that it was Spencer, not sprinkles). He kind of made me miserable for a while. I tried so hard to ‘look good’ when going to work, for the chance that Marty would be there, but Sprinkles was quick to wipe cheese in my hair, or ‘accidently’ spill the jalapeno juice on me so I smelled just peachy. But in his defense, we turned out to be pretty good friends. As the years passed, I left the concessions, and moved to the lifeguard stand. With 2 little shouts from my whistle, ‘Sprinkles’ was on his way out to me, Laffy Taffy’s in hand. He always new that’s what I wanted.

At our wedding reception, we had all of the tables labeled with all the different places in our town, that have been a big part of our lives growing up, instead of labeling with the traditional number. So of course, it seemed fitting that our head table, had none other than “Rainbow Falls” cast upon it. And of course, a year earlier when I had finally ran into Marty, after 6 years, he somehow made it into my cellphone under the name “Rainbow Falls” It’s been like that for 3 years now, I don’t think I’ll ever be able to change it. ‘Marty’ would call and I would look at it and say “Who?” Oh, and did I mention that Rainbow Falls shares a parking lot with the church we got married in? Which is also 3 blocks down the street from the house we bought? Hmmmm.

So thank you Rainbow Falls. Thank you for my $5.25/hour. Thank you for the daily cheese stains. Thank you for the free pizza’s. And don’t forget all those wonderful Choco Taco’s. Thank you for the memories and the friends. And most of all, Thank you for letting my wonderful husband, see past the fashionable cheese stains, the jalapeno perfume, and hot dog water lotion. He might not have fallen in love with me 11 years later, with out his Rainbow Falls goggles...